Battle Hymn of the Tiger Mother by Amy Chua

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When word of this book came out, the online world, and into the physical one, was in a frenzy. Amy Chua’s article in the Washington Street Journal has 8800 comments, the majority of which criticized her “Chinese mother” parenting style, and others defending and praising her, such as her daughters.

If you’re from the Western world, you’ve probably heard of this stereotype of how Chinese parents are very strict with their children: forcing them to play piano and/or violin and practice for hours every day, not accepting any grade lower than an A (A-‘s included), and anything fun is prohibited. The result: seemingly prodigious children and the envy of other parents.

When I first read the article, I was not surprised. I know Chinese friends whose parents are similar to Chua and about the relationship within that kind of family. My family (Chinese immigrants) on the other hand is nothing like Chua’s. I was never forced to get straight As, although I held that standard for myself. I played violin, not the piano because our apartment could not fit one, for 7 years until I had to focus on university, but I did not have my mother breathing down my neck or threatening at me at the top of her lungs during practice, which was only an hour a day and not 3 like her children. Manners and being polite are must-dos in our house and in public, although I am able to push some limits at home. I was allowed to go to sleepovers, have fun, play sports and watch TV, unlike Chua’s children. My parents do, however, strongly insist on certain things like going to Chinese school for 10 years and which university to go to (which I am very glad they did), but still allow me to choose what I want to do (psychology, and not science, business, engineering).